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The Divorce Remedy: The Proven 7-Step Program for Saving Your Marriage, by Michele Weiner-Davis
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Michele Weiner-Davis offers an empowering and encouraging guide for revitalizing marriage and building stronger, more loving bonds.Michele Weiner-Davis goes beyond her marriage-saving bestseller, Divorce Busting, with this empowering and encouraging guide for revitalizing marriage and building stronger, more loving bonds. In a down-to-earth style that is free of psychobabble, Weiner-Davis outlines a realistic, solution-oriented seven-step program for managing marital problems, which, when left unchecked, can drain the life out of a relationship. Using revealing anecdotes and in-depth case studies, she illustrates practical ways for marriage partners to -avoid the “divorce trap” -identify specific marriage-saving goals -move beyond ineffective, hurtful ways of interacting -become an expert on “doing what works” -overcome infidelity, Internet obsessions, depression, sexual problems, and midlife crises -get your marriage back on track—and keep it there Rescue your marriage with the proven techniques of The Divorce Remedy—sound, sensible advice from a renowned relationship expert!
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Product details
Paperback: 320 pages
Publisher: Simon & Schuster; Reprint edition (September 4, 2002)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0684873257
ISBN-13: 978-0684873251
Product Dimensions:
5.5 x 1 x 8.4 inches
Shipping Weight: 10.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.3 out of 5 stars
122 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#22,353 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
My husband has been in love with someone else (20 years younger and stunning) for more than a year, said he was filing for divorce and was about to move out. Said he didn't love me anymore. Didn't care what God, researchers, our children, parents, friends thought. DONE. I bought this book a month ago and gave Michele's methods a good try, even though I was 90% sure my husband was too far gone. Knowing my days were numbered, I read the book more than five times and spent hours on the divorcebusting.com online community. I started GAL (Getting a Life), exercising, eating healthy (but haven't lost weight yet), wearing different clothes (but not seductive or anything), doing different things, having a little fun, stopped talking about the relationship, kept my mouth shut! No more pressure, criticism, or unforgiveness. There will be time to work on issues later, but not if he's GONE. I developed extreme patience. I secretly took notes about what worked and didn't work, and noticed the small ways he was changing, which gave me hope. I ignored the other woman, hardest thing I've ever done! And... it is working! First, I noticed my husband just watching me with interest. Then, a few hugs and invitations out for low-key "dates". Sometimes I was available, sometimes not. Yesterday, he hugged me, kissed me, said he loves me and is determined to work things out with me. I can tell he really is ready now to work on the marriage and his issues. This man, who was prideful and rebellious, is now humbled and repentant. Truly a miracle. Go for it! Fire the marriage counselor and do what really works! There is too much divorce happening. Don't add to the stats. Follow these techniques for as long as it takes and never give up!
After some disastrous "counseling" sessions, some useless books and six months of separation I bought this. I read it and gave it to my husband to read, and finally we started putting things back together. The practical, solution- based tone of this book set it apart from many of the other marital books I've found. I think the logical approach will work better for us than some of the touchy feely stuff we've come across. Being an atheist/nondenominational Christian mixed marriage it was also important to us that the book was fairly neutral in that respect.
I wanted out of my marriage - and wanted the separation and divorce - but bought this book as a last ditch effort - and I purchased the coaching services. I was married to a covert narcissist who used these techniques to further victimize me and the kids. This book and the coaching services should lead with questions to identify what type of partner you have and state that these techniques should NOT be used with narcissists.
My marriage was a complete wreck when I ordered this book. After reading it I realized everything I had been doing incorrectly and started paving the way to a better relationship with my husband. We are now stronger than ever and I have this book to thank. If you're marriage is on the rocks or has even already vaulted off the cliff, trust me when I say you need to buy this book.
While title leads you to believe this is a book about impending divorce and how to prevent it, it also has great tips for keeping a marriage happy and healthy. After 20 years of marriage, we hit a rough spot. This book reminded us that we have to continue to work at it and lots of great ideas on how. Never take each other for granted or get so comfortable that you feel more like roommates. Our marriage is back on track but I will continue to refer back to this book on a regular basis to remind us not to take each other for granted and how to handle certain issues.
This book has a lot of advice I would never give any human. Things like "do what works, even if you think it's unfair or unreasonable" and "learn quickly to back off, shut up, and walk away when you want to speak out". While there are some useful tidbits, most of it could be summed up as tactics to suppress your feelings and try to manipulate your spouse, delivered in a very self-righteous and biased package.While a lot of the advice could be summed up as harmless even if it's not good, some of it is potentially dangerous if your partner is controlling or manipulative. I find the advice not to discuss your relationship with your friends, family or therapist extremely concerning especially for anyone in an emotionally or physically abusive situation, as isolation is a common trait of these partners and the book makes it sound not only normal and okay but desirable.Do yourself a favor, skip this book and buy John Gottman's Seven Secrets for Making Marriage work - be your authentic self, and try to build (or rebuild) a loving and respectful relationship if you can.
Superb. One of my all time best resources to recommend to friends and clients, because it focuses on what one person can do about a relationship, rather than requiring both people to get counseling or something like that. Usually only one person in a relationship is really motivated to do something differently, and this book coaches that one person to radically improve the relationship all by themselves. Also, the author is "marriage-safe," meaning she is oriented towards bolstering the relationship, not towards figuring out reasons to give up easily. (The Divorce Busting phone coaching service is the one I recommend unconditionally--it is excellent.) Practical, hope-giving, empowering.
an updated version to the Divorce Busting book. I highly recommend this book to anyone looking for coping mechanisms and advice on how to turn around a difficult marital situation. I recommend this book for anyone wanting good solid marital help even if there is no trouble in paradise as it offers a lot of relationship guidance to prevent and maintain a good relationship.
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